Earth destroyed in Solar Tsunami: Headline Aaj Kal

India’s fastest news channel, Aaj Kal — whose byline is “tomorrows news today” — ran a special news bulletin about shock waves on the surface of the Sun: a phenomenon termed as solar tsunami. The shock waves were so powerful that they destroyed the earth tomorrow.

AAj Kal Television has urged all its viewers to watch these clips of Earth’s destruction today as tomorrow we’re all going to die. Many scientists, the channel claimed, are saying that this is a once-in-a-life-time event for any planet. However Aaj Kal’s astrologers have claimed that this has already happened 314956 times before.

“Yes it has happened before”, he said when questioned by a caller, “and each time Lord Bramha has recreated earth from scratch”

Aaj Kal anchor claimed that the channel had covered the event in its previous occurrence, but the tapes were lost in the destruction.

“This time we’re using the powers of Maharshi Shri Shri Triloksamrat to backup the telecast on rahu and ketu simultaneously”

Headlines Day After Tomorrow, a competitor of Aaj Kal, has claimed that this is a false news.

“This is a cheap attempt at getting more TRPs. It’s all untrue. We’re already covering the marriage of a buffalo and a rat, that took place day after tomorrow. If earth is destroyed tomorrow how can that happen?”, the spokesperson for the channel said.

More updates tomorrow.


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